Mark uk's blog
Fetish fight club
To my shock and dismay I had a link come up on my facebook via BJJ underground. A group to which a number of my UK, US and Singapore BJJ friends belong.
A site called Vice has done a video of new group in the UK called fetish fight club. In the Vice article is refers to this site as a Gay wrestling site.
I would like to point out that a number of people have contacted me very concerned that this has been done and then linked to sites outside of meetfighters. They are very discreet people and are considering leaving the site. I don't care that this Fetish club has started but the impression it has left about meetfighters, I consider to be very extremely damaging.
Check the link Video.vice.com Posted 20.33 on 19 Dec. Last night when I first checked looked it already had 6500 negative comments. Lunchtime on 20th its now at 8500.
It took me a long time to feel confident enough to post face pictures here and now I find myself looking to delete them. In the mean time I have moved all pix to Members only.
I would like to point out to the individuals in the video that this is the official text posted on the meetfighters site:
MeetFighters.com is a social network and personals site for people who share an interest in anything related to wrestling, fighting or the people who do it. Our intention is to let people meet and get to know each other.
Who are we?
MeetFighters.com has no corporate owner or commercial interest behind it. We are a site run by enthusiast and supported by donations from our members. The volunteers who run the site simply love to meet fellow wrestlers and fighters and want to create a forum for likeminded people.
What do we offer?
We give you a place to meet others who share our interest. We offer all core features for free. All we ask in return is you be cool, respect others and obey our very simple and straightforward Terms of Service.
Hopefully the article can be removed but i fear its all a little to late.
Gabe Steel (96 )
20/12/2017 09:58Can. You send the link cannot find it
Tynesider (84)
20/12/2017 10:51It will be worthwhile changing your settings so that only members that are logged in can view photo's.
A man from that Vice company sent messages or posted a blog about doing this film.
Mark uk (292)
20/12/2017 10:53(In reply to this)
Yeah I have already changed all my settings and pictures to members only
I should have to do this though.
Tynesider (84)
20/12/2017 11:24I agree but this is the way the world is; put something online and you lose control.
Mark uk (292)
20/12/2017 11:32It’s not just about my face though mate. It’s about this video has painted us a gay guys with a fetish. I have met many many great guys on here who are straight and bloody awesome wrestlers. Difficult enough for these guys and now people want to paint us all as gay.
ferdybear (27)
20/12/2017 13:28I try to find the post but don't find on vice. Have you the link?
Mark uk (292)
20/12/2017 14:38If you have Facebook the search Vice
It’s on the 19th Dec at 20.32
Sorry but I am rubbish with technology
ruffnhard (118)
20/12/2017 15:23Thought it was pretty balanced actually:
One guy who wrestles and doesn't do anything sexual.
One guy who wrestles for sex.
A couple of guys that wrestle with or without sex.
Direct link here:
https://video.vice.com/en_us/video/vice-fringes-underground-sex-fetish-fight-club/5a141348177dd46fc1240661
Mark uk (292)
20/12/2017 15:56(In reply to this)
Back to my original point. It says that this is a gay wrestling site and that is not true.
ferdybear (27)
20/12/2017 17:03You are right, but how can be fixed it?
A declaration from the administrator?
Sending comments to Vice for the participants?
Showing other wrestlers straight to the reporter?
Mostly of the wrestlers don't are open to talk, or to be exposed or inclusive talk about what happend around (talking about themes like this of course)
Sugestions??
GrappleViking (115 )
20/12/2017 20:06(In reply to this)
Just not make the video in the first place, that’s how to fix it... I mean, good production, but: The majority of members on this site wants to remain anonymous. I don’t see the point of making a video about a community and bringing publicity to it, when most of us try so hard to keep it quiet and secret. Maybe that’s just me.
celtwrestle (46 )
21/12/2017 01:00Getting hysterical leads to more attention from trolls etc. as marks say, just change settings. The only ones likely to take umbrage are martial arts / bjj purists who might feel their sport is being degraded. But
Must if the good ones aw chilled and have a sense of humor about it
HalfGuard (59)
21/12/2017 08:54...and no mention of those who use this site for the sport, exercise or friendship?
I see Vice were just looking for shock value here, their description is pretty biased too.
Mark uk (292)
21/12/2017 09:52(In reply to this)
I agree. Not a good advert for the site for the site at all.
I did send a message to support about it but still no response. Maybe they will comment here at some point
V AFighter (5)
25/12/2017 17:58All my photos are already members only but I'm seriously considering deleting all my face pics and doing body pics only. This is absolutely horrible for the site and I'm pissed at the people who took it upon themselves to make this video and describe the site in this manner and risk exposure for all of us. They had no right.
Mark uk (292)
25/12/2017 18:05Totally agree and still awaiting the site to respond to my complaint.
V AFighter (5)
25/12/2017 18:15(In reply to this)
The site needs to, at a minimum, make an official protest to Vice and ask them to alter the description. I've been doing Bjj for years. I am a purple belt and a coach at my gym. I keep that portion of my life and this portion completely separate, never the two shall meet. Imagine my horror then when I saw this video popup on a prominent BJJ site on Facebook. This simply cannot stand.
Mark uk (292)
25/12/2017 21:05Need more people to raise this with the site owners then maybe they might respond.
celtwrestle (46 )
27/12/2017 02:50I can't imagine Vice backing down if they're challenged on this.
Mark uk (292)
27/12/2017 02:58Sorry, my reference was to Meetfighters not vice. Did MF know a video being made about a fetish fight club and that Vice was going to refer to this site as a gay wrestling site.
It seems several guys on here had been approached but refused.
I can’t my blog of 20th December anymore for some reason.
ANY COMMENTS /RESPONSES FROM MF WOULD BE HELPFUL.
ruffnhard (118)
27/12/2017 05:23Ok, so it seems the BIG issue here is that someone dared to refer to our beloved site as a “gay” site… if that’s it I really don’t see the concern.
Lets get real here guys, the site IS predominantly comprised of gay male fighters, no matter what the site charter may state… and yes I am including as gay the so called “straight” guys who have sexual encounters with other men. I don’t care how many wives you have or children you can pull out as “proof of your heterosexuality, if you are getting your penis out with another man you may not be exclusively gay, but you sure as heck are not 100% straight!
Look at all the (very unnecessary) dick pics that are flooding the site, and appearing on plenty of “straight” profiles… the amount of guys listed as straight, yet list their fetishes as “jerk off” “wrestle for top” etc, etc.
Sure there are a small number of actual straight guys here, and plenty of gay, bi guys who just want to wrestle, nothing more. But there is also a big proportion who are here to wrestle and get off in various ways…. it is undeniably a big part of the site.
Now as a gay man I’m a bit offended that some of you are so outraged at the possibility of being presumed, correctly or not, to be gay… Hello people, it’s almost 2018, it’s really not something to be ashamed about!
Most modern countries are accepting to the point where gay marriage is legal (and thank god we finally joined you this year), there are laws against discrimination, you can’t be fired, harassed etc. So what’s the big deal if someone incorrectly presumes you are gay? It has no more stigma than if they presumed you were the wrong religion or nationality!
(Yes I know there are some countries where gay sex is still illegal, but you can live openly and safely in these regions as the law is very much a token, and unless you go having sex in public you are generally left alone)
Richard Simmons recently lost a defamation case where a rag reported incorrectly that he was transitioning to a woman… the judge threw his case against them out as there is no longer any shame in transitioning, if he was, or wasn’t, it didn’t matter, no shame, no harm… the world has progressed people, time to move on with it!
If you are worried that your relative or workmate might recognise you left pec when they stumble across your profile and presume you are gay, then perhaps you have equal reason to wonder what the heck they were doing here… seem like they have a shared interest hmmmm!
I think the only people who could be concerned about this site being referred to as gay may be those who consider themselves straight when their actions prove otherwise. Pretty sure the real straight guys who are comfortable enough with their manhood to list themselves here and wrestle gay/straight/bi wouldn’t give a damn about the possibility of being incorrectly labeled!
GrappleViking (115 )
27/12/2017 12:00(In reply to this)
For me, the issue is not AT ALL about me being gay or not; it’s about the fact that I don’t want all my friends and family to know I really enjoy wrestling gay men in their 50s, wearing just speedos. I want to remain anonymous where that is concerned. All my friends and family knows I am bi... But I would very much like to keep my wrestling side of life a secret. That’s why I have a problem with the video. It brings unnecessary attention to the site.
Anyways, that is my personal concern.. I understand if not everyone shares this same opinion.
V AFighter (5)
27/12/2017 17:56(In reply to this)
That is not the only issue as I'm sure you're well aware. Many (most?) of us prefer to remain discreet yet these folks took it upon themselves to raise the profile of the site as a "gay fetish site". Additionally, what people choose to identify as is up to them, not you. There are many straight, yet curious, males that would never have signed up to a site that explicitly stated it is a gay fetish site but felt more comfortable signing up for this one. If we allow the identity of the site to be changed it will scare most of these folks away, which is something that I think most of us don't want. There are plenty of gay personals and gay dating sites that explicitly advertise as such. If this is something that you wish then sign up for one of those sites. This is not specifically a gay dating or gay personals site. It is welcoming to all, and I hope it stays that way.
Mark uk (292)
27/12/2017 06:13Not a big issue I agree to you and other guys that are out, proud or maybe wanna tell the world that they get turned on by wrestling but not let people see who you are. So I assume you also like some level of discretion?
However, there are still a great many guys whether gay Bi or straight that like to keep this discreet and may not have seen the article or my blog and therefore not had an opportunity to remove a face pix.
No I doubt a relative will recognise my right pec but I have removed my face pix due to the Vice article and what it portrays me as. An article that as I mentioned before has been connected to a Legitimate BJJ site which now has 12900 negative comments.
It will be a sad day when everyone feels the need to hide on this site the face and we end up talking to a faceless person.
ruffnhard (118)
27/12/2017 13:03(In reply to this)
Well I do agree with you that it is a shame the video was made, it does not represent me or the guys I wrestle, but I guess it would have to be movie length to fit all types in and they obviously look for those who will get a bit of a reaction.
Yup I like a level of discretion, I may live out and honestly, but that does not mean I need to tell everyone what I may or may not do in my private time with another male…. hence I am faceless.
But I’ve been faceless since the day I joined years ago. I knew even back then it would not be a good idea to put my face on any website as you simply don’t know where any of your pics will end up… even on my family friendly facebook page I do not appear shirtless for this very reason. You get my face, or you get my body, you never both! Seems like a wise idea to me.
As to how the Vice site portrays us, a 5 second glance at the Photos page, or a quick read of a story or some of the more "descriptive" recommendations will gain much the same conclusions...now I do agree the video may point people here who would not normally check us out, but most will take that 5 second glance and leave, not spend hours scanning for a workmates profile.
I’m not sure you can expect any action on this situation but am glad you spotted this video and were able to move your face pics so you can feel safe, and I’m sure you’ve shared the advice with all your friends… P.s. I am always happy to talk to a faceless person, after all it’s your body I’m going to wrestle, don't really care about your face :)
Mark uk (292)
27/12/2017 14:59All very valid points of view guys and thanks for your inputs. I very much appreciate and value your views.
Mark uk (292)
27/12/2017 18:26Another great point buddy
Interestingly still no feedback from the site owners either
Hardmatch (99)
28/12/2017 09:59I do understand how some guys have issues with this video but I feel these guys are worrying far too much about its actual impact. How many people have actually seen this video? Please bear with me as I decided to do some research (I apparently have too much time on my hands and I tend to multitask while watching Perry Mason and The Twilight Zone). Anyway, according to a business story in The Telegraph:
"Viceland has attracted small audiences. According to industry ratings data, its biggest hit is Hamilton's Pharmacopeia, a US-produced documentary series about recreational drug use, which gets around 100,000 viewers."
The UK population is approximately 65.64 million (Wikipedia). A rough calculation shows that the most popular show on Viceland attracts 0.15% of the UK population. I'm assuming that the video that has some people on here so upset would have drawn a significantly smaller audience. Of those that checked out the video, how many actually stayed to watch the entire episode? Of those that were curious enough to watch all or most of the show, how many were then curious enough to actually check out Meetfighters?
It is unfortunate that the video lists MF and similar sites as a Fetish Fight Club though. There are so many reasons why guys get into wrestling.
Mark uk (292)
28/12/2017 11:26(In reply to this)
The BJJ site that Vice has connected to has had 12900 negative comments about what we supposedly do. Not really a true representation of why a lot of guy meet as I said before.
The point was also that many guys including myself belong to str8 BJJ clubs of which my colleagues have seen the video
celtwrestle (46 )
28/12/2017 11:16After watching this short Vice doc, I felt more awkward about the standard of wrestling!
@ mark U.K. - not sure how MF is meant to respond. This site is in the public realm but protected but largely limited to members. As ruff n hard says, how would you explain away the needless dick pics and occasionally vulgar profiles?
Making an issue out of it only leads to more negative attention.
In all, the most worrying part of the film was when Brit pro heel recalled how he couldn't dive over the top rope st a legit pro-wrestling training school.
Like also how the risqué pics that adorn a certain ring were removed in time for scenes to be shot.
Best to have a good laugh about it really
Mark uk (292)
28/12/2017 11:30(In reply to this)
Not that I agree with dick pix either but each to there own. However, a dick pix won’t go to a public area. If you have your face in a public gallery then anyone can come onto the site and see you even if not a member.
John Fredman (9)
14/1/2018 02:26I just noticed that the Mirror ran a piece (no idea if solely online or also in their hard copies) on this program too so it would appear its reach is greater than just the Vice channel now:
http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/real-life-stories/like-sweaty-fast-aggressive-each-11721556
As well as the International Business Times:
http://www.ibtimes.co.uk/fetish-wrestling-behind-scenes-underground-kink-community-1653413
V AFighter (5)
14/1/2018 12:39(In reply to this)
Wonderful. 😒
Mark uk (292)
14/1/2018 14:16(In reply to this)
Thanks John. More glowing comments I see in the feedback.
It’s a closed subject for me now. I have dealt with my pictures on here and the owners of MF seem uninterested which is their prerogative.